Road Trip Top Ten

The TOP TEN most important things learned from our gallant trek across the United States:

1. Be prepared to sell your right arm to afford the tolls in New York.

2. Avoid Pennsylvania at all costs, for reasons of general uncleanliness, lack of adequate gas stations, and above all, the fact that it is B O R I N G.

3. Buy a car charger. The outlets in Taco Bell aren't active. You'd have to walk to McDonald's to find a working outlet if your phone died in Ohio.

4. Without a turbo booster, a caravan and rocket launchers, never attempt Cleveland at rush hour.

5. The first exit in New York is for Canaan. We'd have never left if we'd known the promised land was oh-so-close.

6. After driving through the picturesque parts of Massachusetts, New York, Pennsylvania and Ohio, Indiana has the ugliest landscape imaginable.

7. New York cops are sneaky sneaky. They don't sit on the road, they hide in the grass.

8. The Relevant Podcast has the ability to entertain even the most tired soul for hours on end. Michelle listened to it for nine of the eighteen hours.

9. If one gets on I-90 in Mass, they wouldn't have to get off of it until ILLINOIS. That's right... one road, many names, FIFTEEN hours.

10. Never leave your friends in NH. It's miserable.